How our inner Ego sometimes misjudges a PERSON

A lady in a faded grey dress and her husband, dressed  in a home-spun suit  walked in timidly without an appointment into the Harvard University President's outer office. The secretary could  tell in a moment that such backwoods, country hicks had no business at Harvard and probably didn't even deserve to be in Harvard.

"We want to see the President "the man said softly.

"He'll be busy all day "the secretary snapped.

"We'll wait" the lady replied.

For hours the secretary ignored them, hoping that the couple would finally become discouraged and go away. They didn't and the secretary grew frustrated and finally decided to disturb the president..

"Maybe if you see them for a few minutes, they'll leave" she said to him.

The President, stern faced and with dignity, strutted toward the couple.

The lady told him "We had a son who attended Harvard for one y ear. He loved Harvard. He was happy here. But about a year ago, he was accidentally  killed. My husband and I would like to erect a  memorial to him, somewhere on campus."

The president wasn't touched....He was shocked.  "Madam "he said, gruffly, we can't put up a statue for every person who attended  Harvard and died. If we did, this place would look like a cemetery."

"Oh, no," the lady explained quickly" We don't  want to erect a statue. We  thought we would like to give a building to  Harvard."

The president rolled his eyes. He glanced at the gingham dress and homespun suit, and then exclaimed, "A building! Do you  have any earthly idea how much a building costs? We have over seven and a half million dollars in the physical buildings here at Harvard."

For a moment the lady was silent. The president  was  pleased. Maybe he could get rid of them now. The lady turned to her  husband and said quietly, "Is that all it costs to start a university ? Why  don't we just start our own?"

Her husband nodded. The president's face wilted in confusion and  bewilderment. Mr. & Mrs. Leland Stanford got up and  walked away, traveling to Palo Alto, California where they established  the University that bears their name: -Stanford University, a memorial to a son that Harvard no longer  cared about.

 

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Most of the time we judge people by their outer  appearance, which can be misleading. And in this impression, we tend to treat people badly by thinking they can do nothing for us. Thus we tend  to lose our potential good friends, employees or customers.

Remember in our life, we seldom get people with  whom  we want to share &  grow our thought process. But because of our inner EGO we miss them forever.It is you who have to decide with whom you are getting associated in day   to day life.

Small people talk about others, Average people talk about things, Great people talk about ideas. The best mirror is an old friend.

recd as fwd email

1. Symptom: Cold and humid feet.
Cause: Glass is being held at incorrect angle…you’re pouring the drink on your feet.
Cure: Maneuver glass until open end is facing upward.

2. Symptom: The wall facing you is full of lights.
Cause: You're lying on the floor.
Cure: Position your body at a 90-degree angle to the floor.

3. Symptom: The floor looks blurry.
Cause: You're looking through an empty glass.
Cure: Quickly refill with your favorite beverage.

4. Symptom: The floor is moving.
Cause: You're being dragged away.
Cure: At least ask where they're taking you.

5. Symptom: You hear echoes every time someone speaks.
Cause: You have your glass on your ear.
Cure: Stop making a fool of yourself!

6. Symptom: The room is shaking a lot, everyone is dressed in white and the music is very repetitive.
Cause: You're in an ambulance.
Cure: Don't move. Let the professionals do their job.

7. Symptom: Your dad and all your brothers are looking funny.
Cause: You're in the wrong house.
Cure: Ask if they can point you to your house.

recd as fwd email

A little old is walking down the street one afternoon, when he sees a woman with perfect breasts.

He says to her, "Hey miss, would you let me bite your breasts for $100?"

"Are you nuts?!" she replies, and keeps walking away.

He turns around, runs around the block and gets to the corner before she does. "Would you let me bite your breasts for $1,000 dollars?" he asks again.

"Listen you; I'm not that kind of woman! Got it?"

So the little old man runs around the next block and faces her again, "Would you let me bite your breasts - just once - for $10,000 dollars?!"

She thinks about it for a while and says, "Hmm, $10,000 dollars...Ok, just once, but not here. Let's go to that dark alley over there."

So they go into the alley, where she takes off her blouse to reveal the most perfect breasts in the world. As soon as he sees them, he grabs them and starts caressing them, fondling them slowly, kissing them,licking them, burying his face in them - but not biting them.

The woman finally gets annoyed and asks, 'Well? Are you gonna bite them or not?'

"Nah," says the little old man ... "Costs too much!"

recd as a fwd email

Wife:          'What are you doing?'
Husband:     ' Nothing'
Wife:          'Nothing...?  You've been reading our marriage certificate for an hour.'
Husband:      'I was looking for the expiration date.'

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If you are not one of those who sends the self typed emails without proof reading or not very good at typing....hmmm...or you request the other person to type the email for you...better be careful.

1. In B. ED

A daughter sent an email to her father on passing her B. Ed.  exams, which the father received as "Father, your daughter has been successful in BED"

2. Who is here?

A husband, while on a business trip to a hill station sent an email to his wife "I wish you were here."

The message  received by the wife was "I  wish you were her"

3.Top and Bottom

A man wanted to celebrate his wife's Birthday by throwing a  party.

So  he  ordered a birthday cake. The salesman asked him what message he wanted put on the cake.

He thought for a moment and said, put "Getting older but you are getting better".

The salesman asked "How do you want me to put it?"

The man said 'Well...put "You are getting older" at the top and "But you are getting better" at the bottom.'

When the cake was unveiled at the party all the guests were aghast at the message on the cake.

It reads "You are getting older at the top, but you are getting better at the bottom"

Moral of the Story:

1.  Double proof read everything before you send.
2.  Don't trust others to write it right for you.
3.  Don't order cakes by telephone.

recd as fwd email

A keen immigrant Indian Marwadi lad applied for a salesman's job at London's premier downtown department store. In fact, it was the biggest store in the world - you could get anything there.

The boss asked him, "Have you ever been a salesman before?" "Yes sir, I was a salesman in India ", replied the lad. The boss liked the cut of him and said, "You can start tomorrow and I'll come and see you."

The day was long and arduous for the young man, but he got through it. And finally 6:00 PM came around. The boss duly fronted up and asked, "How many sales did you make today?" "Sir, Just ONE sale." said the young salesman. "Only one sale?" blurted the boss.. "No! No! You see here, most of my staff make 20 or 30 sales a day. "If you want to keep this job, you'd better be doing better than just one sale. By the way "How much was the sale worth?" "300534.00 pounds" said the young Marwadi.

"What.....how did you manage that?" asked the flabbergasted boss.

"Well", said the salesman, "This man came in and I sold him a small fish hook, then a medium hook and finally a really large hook. Then I sell him new fishing rod and some fishing gear. Then I asked him where he was going fishing and he said down the coast. So I told him he'd be needing a boat, so I took him down to the boat department and sold him that twenty-foot schooner with the twin engines. Then he said his Volkswagen probably wouldn't be able to pull it, so I took him to our automotive department and sold him that new Deluxe 4X4 Blazer.

I then asked him where he'll be staying, and since he had no accommodation, I took him to camping department and sold him one of those new igloo 6-sleeper camper tents. Then the guy said, while we're at it, I should throw in about 100 Pounds worth of groceries and two cases of beer.

The boss took two steps back and asked in astonishment, "You sold all that to a guy who came in for a fish hook!!"

"No" answered the salesman, "he came in to buy a box of Sanitary napkins for his wife and I said to him, "Sir, Your weekend is screwed anyway, you might as well go fishing."

Boss - "You sit in my chair.......".

[recd as a fwd email]

JP adds - And all those guys who do not have to buy SNs due to MENO..NO..NO problems might as well go for permanent fishing....as in any case their lives are screwed up on a 24*365 basis

A lady in a faded grey dress and her husband, dressed in a home-spun suit walked in timidly without an appointment into the Harvard University President's outer office. The secretary could tell in a moment that such backwoods, country hicks had no business at Harvard and probably didn't even deserve to be in Harvard.

"We want to see the President "the man said softly. "He'll be busy all day "the secretary snapped."We'll wait" the lady replied.

For hours the secretary ignored them, hoping that the couple would finally become discouraged and go away. They didn't and the secretary grew frustrated and finally decided to disturb the president..

"Maybe if you see them for a few minutes,they'll leave" she said to him. The President, stern faced and with dignity,strutted toward the couple.

The lady told him "We had a son who attended Harvard for one y ear. He loved Harvard. He was happy here. But about a year ago, he was accidentally killed. My husband and I would like to erect a memorial to him, somewhere on campus."

The president wasn't touched....He was shocked."Madam "he said, gruffly, we can't put up a statue for every person who attended Harvard and died. If we did, this place would look like a cemetery."

"Oh, no," the lady explained quickly" We don't want to erect a statue. We thought we would like to give a building to Harvard."

The president rolled his eyes. He glanced at the gingham dress and homespun suit, and then exclaimed, "A building!Do you have any earthly idea how much a building costs? We have over seven and a half million dollars in the physical buildings here at Harvard."

For a moment the lady was silent. The president was pleased. Maybe he could get rid of them now. The lady turned to her husband and said quietly, "Is that all it costs to start a university ? Why don't we just start our own?"

Her husband nodded. The president's face wilted in confusion and bewilderment. Mr.and Mrs. Leland Stanford got up and walked away, traveling to Palo Alto, California where they established the University that bears their name: - Stanford University, a memorial to a son that Harvard no longer cared about.

Most of the time we judge people by their outer appearance, which can be misleading and many times, very costly

recd as a fwd email

The liquid inside young coconuts can be used as a substitute for

Blood plasma.

**************
No piece of paper can be folded in half more than seven (7) times.

**************

Donkeys kill more people annually than plane crashes.

**************

You burn more calories sleeping

than you do watching television.

***************

Oak trees do not produce acorns until they are fifty (50) years of age or older.

**************
The first product to have a bar code was Wrigley's gum.

**************

The King of Hearts is the only king WITHOUT A MOUSTACHE

**************

American Airlines saved $40,000 in 1987 by eliminating one (1) olive

from each salad served in first-class.

**************

Venus is the only planet that rotates clockwise. (Since Venus is normally associated with women,what does this tell you!)

***************

Apples, not caffeine, are more efficient at waking you up in the morning.

***************

Most dust particles in your house are made from DEAD SKIN!

**************

The first owner of the Marlboro Company died of lung cancer.
So did the first ' Marlboro Man. '

**************

Walt Disney was afraid OF MICE!

**************

PEARLS MELT IN VINEGAR!

*************

The three most valuable brand names on earth: Marlboro, Coca Cola, and Budweiser, in that order.

**************

It is possible to lead a cow upstairs...

but, not downstairs.

**************

A duck's quack doesn't echo, and no one knows why.

**************

Dentists have recommended that a toothbrush be kept at least six (6)feet away from a toilet to avoid airborne particles resulting from the flush.

************

Richard Millhouse Nixon was the first U.S. president whose name contains all the letters from the word 'criminal'.The second ?
William Jefferson Clinton (SURPRISED!?)

***********

And the best for last.....

Turtles can breathe through their butts.

``~~~~`~~~~~~````````~~~~~~~`
recd as a fwd email

A little old lady is walking down the street dragging two plastic garbage bags with her, one in each hand. There's a hole in one of the bags and every once in a while a $20 bill is flying out of it onto the pavement.

Noticing this, a policeman stops her. "Ma'am, there are $20 bills falling out of that bag."

" Darn!" says the little old lady....."I'd better go back and see if I can still find some. Thanks for the warning!"

"Well, now, not so fast," says the cop. "How did you get all that money? Did you steal it?"

"Oh, no", says the little old lady. You see, my backyard backs up to the parking lot of 'Lambeau Field'. Each time there's a game, a lot of fans come and pee in the bushes and right into my flower beds! So, I go and stand behind the bushes with a big hedge clipper, and each time someone sticks his little thingie through the bushes, I say $20 or off it comes!"

"Hey, not a bad idea!" laughs the cop. "OK, good luck! By the way, what's in the other bag?"

"Well," says the little old lady, "some guys think I'm bluffing."

from fwd circuit